What's worse....

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Name an odd hobby or collection of yours!!!

I know that I personally have an odd hobby but I want to hear about yours. It could be anything.....I mean anything! It could be as odd as collecting kites or even different colors of sand. I would like to find out if I am the only odd one out there collecting weird things.

Monday, March 22, 2010

The collection grows!

Currently, as of today, I am rolling 5 beer sweaters deep. After a scary transaction with a sketchy website, I FINALLY acquired the 5th knitted piece of sexiness to my collection. I purchased the sweater on a drunken, "come on!" from a couple of classmates, and with a couple of clicks, I was pot committed. However, it took almost three weeks and a couple of e-mails to get it in my hands. I threw in the towel mentally and thought I was taken for a ride on "internet scam land". To my surprise, the package showed up on my doorstep and my face lit up like a kid in the 80's who received a Nite Brite for Christmas. With every sweater that I gain, my appreciation grows. I thank that website for giving me a tough time with the purchase, I now love Michelob Sweater more then ever.

Monday, March 8, 2010

You're so old but so good.

I have a confession to make... I have fallen in love with something that is older than I am. Something that is above and beyond me. Something that has no feelings, but can make anyone feel so good. If it were legal to marry this, I would. And this thing is..................Beer sweaters. Old, knitted, gross, tacky, warm, vintage, loving, sexy, and yummy beer sweaters. Popular in the 70's and 80's, these gifts from heaven cause my heart to melt. So one would ask," How is this a crappy or awkward situation?" Well, it is crappy when you have a negative balance in your bank account because you have purchased too many beer sweaters online, and that person is me! On the positive side, more money will come to that account, but beer sweaters are limited . I will update at a later time on these lovely loves of knitted awesomeness. But until then, I will leave you with some examples of what I am talking about.

Examples of beer sweaters.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Would you like a floating head with that?

In the restaurant business, a manager or a general manager will do what is called a "table touch". They will walk around the floor and stop by tables and ask how the meal or night is going. In one restaurant, our manager would do what I call the "floating head". Instead of walking up to the table and speaking with customers, he would peak around a wall or corner with his head only and speak. His head would typically be the only thing that they would see, along with his booming voice.


With this going on, I had to find a way to rebuttal at my tables after this traumatic manager experience. I would return to my table promptly after he finished his "table touch". I would ask the guests if my manager had stolen my thunder. I would reassure them that I will try my best to gain it back. I always got some sort of giggle or laugh and felt the evening would be back on track afterwards. Even though he would typically add difficulty to my service, I always enjoyed his hurdles that he would throw at me.

Back off my wife and shake my hand.

So during the weekend, I decided to go out for a boy’s night. The night started with a little bit of karaoke shenanigans. Songs were sung, drinks were demolished, and high-fives were had. After singing we decided to visit a popular country bar. With an hour or so till bar time, most of the kiddies there were feeling mighty good. As I stand next to my friend Joe, he points out two girls that are across the way who he finds attractive. He says that the brunette looks more his type over the blonde. I ask him to go over, and he replies "nah, it's ok". Without hesitation, I leave his side and approach the two girls. I introduce myself and ask both of them their names. The brunette asks how come my friend didn't come over (meaning she's been watching us). I quickly replied "that's the reason I’m here") I signal over Joe with a hand motion and introduce the two. While Joe is talking to the brunette, I turn to the blonde. I try to strike up a random conversation to occupy her and fulfill my wingman duties. Within a minute, she says," you shouldn't be talking to me, and you should leave". I was thrown off and asked her why. She said she's married and her husband has been staring at me from 10 feet away the whole time. I have her point out the husband and walk over to have a chat. He is surrounded by a couple friends who also were watching as well. I ask the husband if the blonde was his wife. He replies “Yes and why the fuck are you talking to her?" His tone and demeanor was of one to start an altercation. I turn and point out my friend Joe and the brunette hitting it off. I tell him my sole purpose of carrying on a convo with his wife, was to give Joe a chance to have a one-on-one convo. As his expression changed, I notice he was wearing a hat that had a picture of a buck on it. I quickly change the convo to hunting and find something we can agree on. Within 5 min, we were smiling and shaking hands. No fights were had and Joe hung out with the brunette into the wee hours of the night. Crappy into happy!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

A little about me!

And here I am posting for the first time.  I figured I would start with a little bit of backround.  I am a 25 year old male and I'm in college.  I go to school full time while holding down a full time job serving at a local restaurant.  For some reason, I tend to have awkward/uncomfortable things happen to me often.  I more so view them as humourous and don't mind sharing them as you will see.  Humor is everywhere, you just have to find it.